Midnight Corey A Knife in Your Eye

Monsters of Misfitboy: Tarantula (1955)

Years ago, Ozzy Osbourne wrote a song called “Thank God for the Bomb,” and I would have to agree. Even for the simple fact that it gave horror fans something special: THE EMERGENCE OF THE ATOMIC GIANT BUG FILMS!

These were some of my favorites. Radiation played a big role in these films, along with atomic test sites. Now there is a documentary out there narrated by Billy Mummy called Attack of the 50 ft. Monster Mania -- it's an amazing doc. That goes through the years of giant bug and monster films.

Universal Pictures didn’t release this film on DVD until 2006. I, on the other hand, bought a laser disc transfer at a horror convention for $20 (pirates that sell copied movies should have their Achilles tendon cut and forced to run a marathon). But anyway, the actor that stars in this film is one of my all-time favorite actors, Mr. John Agar. He was in films such as The Mole People, Revenge of the Creature, The Brain from Planet Arous, and King Kong (1976) (he had a cameo as a city official), among many others.

Now, back in the 50’s, these types of films were popping up at drive-ins all across the country. Kids couldn’t get enough of them! I think the only bugs that were never made into monster movies were dung beetles and horse flies. I mean, Hollywood was pumping these films out left and right.

So here is the plot:

A man staggers through the Arizona desert until he collapses, and we see his face is deformed beyond recognition. The reason: 2 scientists have injected themselves with a growth serum that makes food grow twice its normal size for the growing number of people in the world. This experiment is being conducted by Professor Deemer a recluse who has decided to try his serum on lab animals (guinea pigs, lab mice, rabbits, and a TARANTULA). The animals are growing at an alarming rate. As he is working on his experiments, Paul (his other assistant) enters the room with a mangled face that only a mother could love, and injects Deemer with the serum. A fight ensues and a fire breaks out. Glass starts to shatter and the 3-foot tarantula escapes while Deemer puts out the fire. Deemer buries Paul in the desert and must find a replacement. Local authorities find the first assistant (Eric) and conclude that the cause of death is acromegaly,a rare disease. They ask Deemer if they can conduct an autopsy, and he declines. Dr. Matt Hastings (played by Agar) is upset by this, as the sheriff decided Deemer knows more about it than Matt. The next day Deemer invites a new assistant, Stephanie Clayton (or Steve as she is referred to), to work with him.

Meanwhile, the tarantula is loose and attacks a herd of horses. A car accident is discovered and the victims were devoured. Matt finds a pool of liquid by the remains and confirms it's insect venom. As the film moves on, Matt and Steve begin a relationship as the tarantula is causing a deadly rampage across Arizona (the two drunks that get eaten by the tarantula is a classic 50’s death scene). Back at the lab, Steve has growing concerns about Deemer, who is beginning to deform also. He finally tells Matt and Steve what is going on and that the tarantula escaped.

Then, one evening as Steve is getting ready for bed, the tarantula (now the size of a house) is staring at her through the window! The tarantula destroys the house killing deemer but Matt shows up in time to save Steve. The tarantula moves into the small town and attacks. Machine guns and dynamite are ineffective, so it's time to call the military.

SPOILER ALERT!

The military sends in fighter planes to drop napalm on the giant beast, and guess who the jet squadron leader is? Why, it's none other than Mr. Gran Torino himself, Clint Eastwood! The napalm burns the tarantula and destroys it at the end, right before it enters the town.

I loved this film, and I would have to give it at least an 8 out of 10 for pure fun and enjoyment. If you like this one, you should also try Earth vs. the Spider -- the MST3K version is hilarious!

Well that's it for Tarantula! See you next time at the drive-ins! This is misfit boy and I’m out!

Monsters of Misfitboy: The Giant Claw (1957)

Do you know what was great about horror films back in the ol’ days? There were no battle lines drawn about horror movies. You either liked or disliked them. Horror was horror, and there was no “zombies are better than vampires” or any other BS like that. It was simple. Granted, a lot of critics hated most of them with the exception of a few like Them, The Thing, and others. But most critics didn’t care much for horror films. But kids did. And the best part about it was it didn’t matter what was showing -- they would flock like sheep to see anything. Now those were real horror fans! Anyway, have you ever seen a film that’s so bad it's good? Welcome to The Giant Claw. This is considered “one of the worst films ever made.” I personally enjoy this film for the simple fact it's so bad. The movie has some of the worst narration, acting, and, most of all, FX (a giant puppet bird, with visible strings that Jim Henson would have laughed at). A lot of the film is made with stock footage (an easy way to fill story holes -- and it's cheap too).

Here’s the plot:

Mitch MacAfee (played by Jeff Morrow, who stared in such epic films as The Creature Walks Among Us, Kronos, and This Island Earth -- he came back to the horror genre in 1971 for Octaman) is running radar tests while flying his plane when he spots a UFO. Nothing shows up on the radar screen but the military sends out a squadron of jets to investigate. Nothing is found. When Mitch returns to base, army officials are furious with him. Eventually they start to take him seriously after planes start to disappear.

The reason: a bird, “a bird as big as a battleship,” has been devouring plane after plane and their crews. This giant bird is from outer space and is even equipped with a force shield! Now it's up to Mitch, his mathematician girlfriend, and the military to stop the winged horror! Mitch finds the bird's giant egg and shoots it full of holes. This enrages the creature and it heads right towards New York City. Mitch and some scientists create some sort of anti-matter ray gun to stop the menace. In case anyone has yet to see this film, I wont give away the ending -- BUT I will say it's nothing short of hilarious. At one point in the film, the Giant Claw destroys major buildings in New York.

It’s a film worth watching. Many horror hosts of the 70’s would play this film quite a bit. And the bird itself looks like Warner Bros. cartoon character Beaky Buzzard. Yes, it looks that bad, but I would give it a 5 out of 10 for bad one-liners and even a space ship can be seen in the distance (stock footage from Earth vs. the Flying Saucers was even used!). Give it a watch -- after all, it's not a long film, and who wouldn’t wanna see one of the worst monster films ever made??!!

Well, see ya next time at the drive-ins! This is misfit boy and I’m out!